Ananda

I’ve been really struggling with this whole existing thing. Existing seems to be all I’m doing, not really living or experiencing. I’m constantly worrying about the people I care about, crying for them, because they’ve used up all their tears.

It’s so painful watching other people’s unhappiness and not being able to do anything to help. Convincing people to keep living is something I’ve been doing since I was 12 years old and it never gets easier, it’s never something you stop hurting over.

When the people that keep you alive don’t want to be alive anymore you’re stuck, really stuck in this kind of limbo land where you’re exist but, again, existing isn’t living, not truly.

It would be nice to only have to worry about what to make for dinner and making sure I hand in my assignments on time for once in my life. ♦