Cammy

I’ve been reading this book called A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart Tolle, for the past month or so. It’s a spiritual-type, self-help book, but not in the way of following any specific religion. It’s really vague about the “Awakening” which is the absolute goal or a state of being or something.

A lot of what this book talks about is dismantling ALL social constructs, down to the alphabet and words and basic things like that. Tolle says that social constructs create our egos, and our egos are these thriving, living, evil things that take away from who you are, and hide your innermost self—the part of your that can feel the interconnectedness of all life forms. Tolle says that people learn from an early age that the 26 letters of the English alphabet, when mixed up and arranged to form words, can define who you are. But, he argues, that isn’t true, because you’re just defining your ego.

Another thing with the ego is that angry feelings and bitterness come from there, not from within. Since understanding that me getting mad or yelling is just my ego trying to keep me from the interconnectedness I have within, I have become a lot less confrontational. It really helps me to pick my battles. I’m still learning how to keep those feelings in check, but it really helps to apply this thinking when dealing with other people. Sometimes my dad says some of the most utterly stupid things to me, and as mad as I could be, I just have to understand that he doesn’t get it. Or, not that he doesn’t get it, but that his ego has been conditioned by the social constructs in our society to think that it’s OK to say things like that to me.

After reading fewer than one hundred pages of this book, I feel as though I have a better understanding of the people around me, which doesn’t make me happier. I see people so disconnected from who they really are, attaching their identities to opinions, and holding people accountable for things they can’t help or don’t understand, and it’s made me really frustrated. I’ve had two or three big cries this month, just because it feels like people don’t care about each other.

Even the concept of right and wrong, or obtaining knowledge, forces you to choose a stance on something, and it’s created by fostering otherness between you and other people. That’s the ego. I am letting go of these ideas as much as I can. I’m learning to forgive people for things they can’t help, instead of holding grudges. I think the most important thing is to just take a step back and look at everything for what it really is. Everyone deserves a happy life, and it’s not gonna happen all at once, but the fact that I am reading this book and learning about how to be better is one more person being more in tune with what life has to offer. ♦