Cammy

I feel so weird!!! I am back to liking this boy I had a crush on pretty much all of junior year and I’m wondering, How did I end up here again? It’s not that he’s a bad person, he’s really great actually, but I’d convinced myself I was over him for a really long time. In retrospect, I was suppressing my feelings for him. One of my friends who wasn’t really supportive of my dreams about this boy had been telling me all summer how ugly my crush had become since school ended. So, when I came back to school and I saw him and he WASN’T ugly…everything got thrown out the window and I was back at square one. Crush 2.0. has already proven to be a lot easier though. I have a friend whom I really relate to who has been really supportive, which I’m grateful for. She’s been through it all and she has a lot of advice to offer and because I trust her, a lot of the anxiety I feel as a result of this crush is going away.

Something else weird that’s happening is that we’re moving! My mom, sister, and I have been living in our current house for six years. This is the house I went through middle school in and that was…such a transformative time! I can’t really imagine what it’s gonna be like not to live here. My mom and stepdad have already found a new place, and we’re supposed to be out of here by the end of the month. In the last week, we gave away like ten huge IKEA bags of clothes away to Goodwill. I’ve known that we were gonna have to move for a really long time, but now that it’s actually coming up it’s becoming a lot more real. I’ve already packed up all my books and there are more boxes in my room right now that are all gonna get filled up soon. It’s not that I’m scared to be moving to another place, I just get attached really easily. I know a year from now it won’t matter, and I keep telling myself that, but it still doesn’t sit well with me. ♦