sunny days

for the most part
of my summer,
I await ‘the sunny days’

whilst everyone else basks in the sun
I take cover in the shade
afraid that the direct light
will unmask my gloomy state

the clear blue skies
strain my mind,
I feel like I’m trapped in a painting
unmoving
the colors are too bright
and smiles too insistent

the images of happiness,
constantly pressing against my gaze,
is blinding

I find that my vision gets overwhelmed
the animals appear to be circling my head
the plants are weaving their way around the earth,
holding it in a prison
and the people are frozen
held captive by the sun and water

the world feels too still

the motionless air
is broken only by the sounds and wings of insects

time extends
because everything appears to be going so much slower

the heat
drains the energy from my bones,
lulling me into an imposed sleep
most days feel like they’re spent half conscious
like I’m sleepwalking

my brain,
in need of the upbeat,
awaits a gust of wind, followed by
the lively music, conversations
and frequent dancing
that summer nights bring
these are the times that raise my spirits

—By Maureen N.