Five ways to win my heart.

1. Puns. Seriously, hit me with a good pun or innuendo and my knees weaken in approval. I will respond by shooting finger guns, or yelling “eyyyyyyy” rather loudly.

2. Impress me with a knowledge of feminism. When someone tells me they’re not a feminist/womanist I automatically switch off and assume the worst of them. They might think they’re saying they believe in the equality of the sexes, but all I hear is “I don’t recognize the systematic oppression of women and minorities.”

3. Be a musician or art student. Or, you know, just be passionate about something, anything (not murder). Passion is wonderful, and it shows that a person can care.

4. Like food as much as me. I like to eat, a lot, so it’s always appreciated when another person likes to eat a lot too. All kinds of food, all the time.

5. Cats. Enough said. ♦