I pretend I am in control
and I pretend I can understand
but I look toward those that resonate
and turn the other cheek
to love a rosy sunset is one thing
and to love the pain is another

but you colored me red
filled me up with none other
you feed me red
and I chew what I don’t want

your neglect is what I want
and your ignorance is what I need
telling myself over and over that it’s good is something
I can’t get enough of
I love crawling back
to those who hold me with clenched hands

your plan is simple
attack me with affection
then leave me out in the open

what I am left with
are sun-dried pieces of myself
and I begin where I started

By Stella Yoo