The Little Door

12:45 AM

Eyes open. What was the dream I was just having? I can never remember. My mind conjures up a few wonky shapes, but nothing useful.

Sit up. Feel the heat fall off me as my doona slips down my torso. I look around, my eyes slowly adjusting to the darkness. In the corner is a faint glowing light on the skirting board. An outline of a rectangle. Must be some residue of a glow in the dark sticker I attempted to glue to my wall a couple of years ago.

1:45 AM

Eyes open again. One of those restless nights. The glow is still there. I slowly get up, body unfolding, joints cracking. I search blindly with my feet for the little slippers next to the bed. Feel the soft fabric, slide my feet in. Without light everything is nothing, except for this glow. I make my way towards it, feeling along the wall with my arm. I bend down to inspect the light.

But it’s not a sticker, it’s a door, a fricking tiny, doll-sized, door. This is some Alice in Wonderland shit. I have to sit and think for a moment.

2:00 AM

Decide to put my hand through. The only thing I can do. But as my hand goes in the sides of the door turn into a soft plasma-ish thing. I can push out with my hand and make a bigger and bigger hole. This cannot be real. Chaz will know what’s going on. I stumble down the hallway and find the next door on the right. I know he’s sleeping but he won’t mind being woken up for this! ‘Chaz,’ in one of those whispers that sounds like a whisper but is really loud. ‘Mgmhfl,’ I hear, the sound caused by a mixture of drool and pillow. I see a face other than Chaz’s pop up from the bed, and remember that Mia is here. Oops. ‘Hey, what is it Clo?’

I also remember she is extremely nice. ‘Ummm. Could you… Just come with me.’
She slowly gets up, and wraps a little shawl round her shoulders. ‘All ok?’
‘Ah, yeah, just wait a second.’ I walk down the hall and open the door to my room.

2:15 AM

‘Oh. Woah.’ Sitting there, basking in the glow, two girls mystified.
‘Look.’ I put my hand in the hole.

‘Oh my god! I guess the only reassuring thing that I can say is yes, I see it too.’
Laughing, softly. I’m glad it was Mia who woke up. ‘Let’s go.’
Hesitation. ‘Um, OK.’

We pull ourselves through, and I get a strange feeling, like my body has been left behind. See nothing, no black, no white, nothing. Will never be able to explain.

3:00 AM

‘One day you will die.’ Voice, coming out of the nothingness, but I stay strangely calm.
‘This is what death is like. Nothing. When you have finished your life, you will come here. This orbit never ends. It is not possible to feel sad or happy here, to be nervous or excited, to love or to hate. And that is OK.’

Woosh. Back, sucked into the world, my room that is so full of things, air, colour that I can’t breathe for a moment.

She smiles at me. We have shared a moment, a secret that will never be told.

‘Goodnight?’

‘Goodnight.’

9:00 AM
Eyes open. What was that dream I was having? I can never remember.
I walk out to breakfast, sit at the table and survey the array of food. All that mundane brown stuff. Chaz has made is way out and sees I look a bit down.

‘What is it, Clo?’

‘Nothing, really.’

—By Olive B., 15, Melbourne, Australia