Lilly

Lately, I’ve been almost overwhelmed by the sheer weight of what I have to accomplish over the next few months—finding a summer job, and starting college applications. But breaking it down into just the next few weeks doesn’t make it any better: I’ll take the dreaded-by-all AP Calculus exam, race a 5K, and help keep my soccer team in the running for playoffs this season. At one point today, I sat down and made a rudimentary list of positives coming up in the next couple of days, just to keep myself afloat during school. Here it is, slightly expanded.

1. I’ve already made playlists to listen to on the way to and from my soccer game tomorrow. I feel like I’m the only member of my team who actually likes away games, but there’s just something novel about going somewhere else to play. My school doesn’t even bother to get school buses for us anymore, so we cram the entire team into a couple of big old Turtle Top vans and the coaches flip coins to decide who has to drive. And the team always gets up to some antics once we get on the highway. In the past week there’s been a lot of food shared (or stolen), professional soccer watched surreptitiously on my phone, and songs on the radio mangled by a bus full of girls who are too happy to be there together to care about how they sound.

2. Today I passed a calculus quiz that played a big role in determining my semester grade. Solving as many integrals as possible in a 15-minute time limit may not be my cup of tea, but I felt good about it, and it must have showed.

3. Now that I have a bit of money of my own to spend, I’m learning how to treat myself to things. Not excessively—I’m still saving a the vast majority of what I earn. But every once in a while I can afford to drop a little bit to get myself something that’ll make me happy, and I think I’m starting to strike that perfect balance.

4. I’m feeling good about our game tomorrow. I’ve never actually played against this team—my freshman year I played for our junior varsity team against this school, and my sophomore year I rode the bench with bronchitis. But that means I know more about them than they do about me, and I tend to get underestimated on the field—especially my speed. But I’m feeling fast and ready and hungry. So far this season I’ve been a spark, a playmaker, even a game changer at times. But now I’m ready to add “goalscorer” to that list. ♦