Editor’s note: Can you pass us a tissue? We have some news that might seem a little sad at first: Jane Marie is no longer going to head up O!YPT. The good news, though: She’s still a Rookie staff writer and will be covering whatever the heck she wants! Amy Rose, who does the Face-ics and is also the person writing this to you, will look after this column for the time being, but before we get back to our regularly scheduled programming, here’s Jane:

Hello, my pretties! Goodbye, my pretties.

It is with bittersweetness and reluctance that I hand over the mantle here at O!YPT. For months, I’ve seen myself in your questions: at 15, wondering what color to dye my hair; at 18, figuring out where my next piercing should be; at 20, trying to decide if dreadlocks are a bad idea. The main thing I’ve wanted to tell you (and then-me) is something like: “I dunno—do whatever you want? You’re young! You’re wild! Don’t fret about what anyone else thinks. Make mistakes, because in those mistakes, you will discover the New Thing, or better yet, Your Thing. Tend your own garden of beautiful accidents. In other words: Do you.”

Beauty advice is one of my favorite things to read, and I love giving advice to my peers, but in this role, I have felt a little like the Cool Mom joining the slumber party. So I’ll leave you whippersnappers to your own devices! Don’t make me come in there.

Jane Marie


Now, on to your questions!

Do you have any recommendations for CHEAP (as in available at the drugstore), skin-friendly products I can use for a “no-makeup” makeup look? I’m a teenager who doesn’t have much money, time, or patience, but I want to look a little more polished on a daily basis. —Anonymous

GIRL HOWDY, CAN I EVER. Hold up, let me go look at my stacked ’n’ packed dressing table, aka my dining room table, and reckon (?) what-all (I’m sorry—I don’t mean to make everyone suffer just because I’M in a fun little “country western” mood—COME BACK, JANE) is on that thing at the moment…


Oh, did you think I was kidding?

  • CoverGirl Invisible Concealer, $6. This is my favorite concealer on the face of this dumb planet—and you know your girl has tried a few. Go with this.
  • Maybelline Dream Bouncy Blush, $8. Much like a sick Jet Ski totally fucking up the vitreous surface of a still pool of water, low-quality powder blush can look like the color is sitting ATOP your skin instead of flushing outward from it like a healthy subcutaneous glowwwwwww. Cream formulations like this one are easier to blend, without the added fuss of using a brush. You can—and should—use your (clean!) fingertips, especially because the second part of this product’s name, at least, is well-earned. I DELIGHT in poking at this weird spongy dome of product. It feels like nothing else in the world. Like a trampoline made out of dairy? I can’t explain it, except to say that I wind up touching it so much that I always end up with a super-excess of blush on my fingers, and my then face, and I warn you to be careful, since following in my fingertips would nullify the point of this whole rodeo.
  • CoverGirl Outlast Lip Stain, $8.50. I’m starting to realize that CoverGirl low-key rules. I never thought about it as a real contender as far as makeup brands go, but between the concealer and this lip stain, they make some of my favorite parts of the lovely tablescape above. I have this in…six? colors, and it’s the best—you can, like, passionately french coffee cups and, guess what, your lips will still be whatever color you wanted them to. Out of all this shit, you will love this product the most, I think: You put it on once in the morning by applying it like you’re drawing a mouth with a Crayola marker, and it makes you look like a bona-fide human who did some extra beautification to her face. Great!
  • Maybelline Full ’N Soft Washable Mascara, $8. This is the don, as far as drugstore mascaras for those who want to “look” “natural” go. It spreads and lengthens your lashes without clumping or even stiffening up the way most other mascaras do upon application. Accept no substitutes.

    And there you have it! Maybe not a WHOLE DINING TABLE’S worth of products, but that isn’t what you asked for. All told, these products will take you a cumulative five minutes, tops, to get on your zone, and that’s only if you get distracted and start thinking about how, seeing as you’re kinda proficient with a thread and needle, you’d TOTALLY be just as capable with a lasso, no question…nah, guys, I would suck. I have no horse in that fight. That’s why I’m here giving you a complete shopping list of all the stuff you need to look a teense more like, “Oh, zang, that girl looks like she is wearing the perfect amount of makeup to look like no makeup at all!” And they said it couldn’t be done… X ARS
    I, like many teenage girls, have trouble coming to terms with my appearance, particularly my face. Over the years I have endured harsh comments from my high school classmates, strangers, my siblings, and even my mum, about how small my eyes are, how ugly my nose is, etc. There is no feature of my face that I like. How do I stop feeling so gross about myself? —Anonymous

    I’ve never met you, but I know how you’re feeling. I’ve felt the same way my whole life. Starting from when I was six years old, I was told by family members that my skin was too dark, my face too pudgy, my nose too broad. I grew up always feeling as though I wasn’t pretty. How could I be, when my own family couldn’t accept me?

    But the older I got, the more I realized that their comments came from a weird place of love and protection—they were worried others wouldn’t accept me and seemed to think that they way to show their love was by trying ot “fix” me. There are, of course, other people who are just mean. No matter what, though, you can choose to internalize their words—or not. It’s really empowering to brush it all off.

    Because, my love, you don’t need to be fixed! I don’t need to see a photo of you to know that you are perfect just as you are—because you’re just as you are. It’s like that scene in Bridget Jones’s Diary where Mark Darcy says to Bridget, “I like you very much, just as you are”:

    I say that to myself like a mantra now, because it’s what I’ve always wanted somebody to say to me, but nobody really ever has, and I don’t know if anyone ever will. I figured out that feeling less gross about myself has a lot to do with me. You have to choose how you want to view yourself, and how you’re going to feel. Some days, I don’t want to walk down the street because I feel so ugly, or like I take up so much space on the sidewalk, in the supermarket, etc.—and I wish I could just be as tiny as I’m feeling inside. But do you know what breaks that cycle? Being on team ME.

    What would it take for you to accept yourself? In my case, it was avoiding fashion and celebrity magazines, refusing to compare myself with others, and avoiding thinking or saying derogatory things about my appearance. Every time I hear or think something mean, I remind myself that I know they’re wrong. (Try it—it’ll make your life a lot easier.) Instead of letting people hurt me, I console myself like I’m my friend, because, of course, I am. “Fariha,” I say, “You’re so great. I love you. You’re smart, you’re kind, you care about people, you want to change the world.” Make a list of all the things you like about yourself—or even a list of people you love or find inspiring—and put it somewhere you can see. Put up illustrations that you like on it, or cool quotes like this one from the writer Audre Lorde: “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”

    When I’m feeling especially self-conscious, I make myself happy by watching an episode of The Mindy Project, going to Sephora or the bookstore, buying a delicious latte, or sitting and talking to a friend who loves me very much, just as I am, and vice versa. Find those people! They’ll make up for the ones who make you feel bad about yourself. And if you don’t have people like that in your life right now, it’s OK, because being happy, in large part, means being your own best friend at all times—which is to say, being TEAM YOU. What would you tell someone you loved if they came to you with this question? Say that to yourself.

    We are always going to have these bodies, so let’s make them work for us. Respect what you are: You are golden. It’s definitely a process, but with a little work and faith, you’ll start to know that’s true. —Fariha Roísín

    Fariha Roísín is a writer that loves love. Follow her frustrations with the patriarchy on Twitter @fariharoisin.