When I Come Back

When I come back
I hope that when I place my ear against her chest
I can still hear the beautiful music played by her heart
That song that has never gotten old, but has forgotten a few beats

When I come back
I wish the children who are no longer playing in the park
Remember me by my smile or at least my voice
I hope they haven’t forgotten that I tried my best to teach them how to fend for themselves

When I come back
I want a real taste of the national dish
I’ve gotten too tired of replicating it because it’s not the same

When I come back
I hope my brothers and sisters remember me
Recognize my face
My hands
My laugh
My smile

When I come back
I want to visit him
Sit on his lap
Apologize to him
Hug him
Laugh and cry

When I come back
I hope he’s not replaced by a cold, gray stone
With flowers scattered everywhere
Because then I won’t be able to say the things I wanted to say
Talk to him about my daughters
My companion
My fears and mistakes

When I come back
I wish he hasn’t forgotten that we have the same eyes, nose and skin color
and I hope he remembers that I have always missed him

If I come back
I want him to know that my oldest daughter is getting taller like him
That my youngest one also shares the same eyes as him
And that my husband has the same sense of humor as him

I just hope
That this life won’t wash away my memories of him
Because that’s the only thing that I will be able to hold on to
If I don’t come back