Thahabu

I was in my mid-teens when my dad granted me the privilege of going to concerts by myself. I would save up the money I made working at my local library, and shop online, in search of for the perfect outfits to wear to shows. I cringed at shirts and dresses that exposed your back. The thought of showing up to a crowded venue with my back on display for everyone to see was my worst nightmare. I was afraid people would snicker and laugh at the sight of my deformed and scarred spine. I imagined myself standing there embarrassed and ashamed.

Friday, I went to a show wearing nothing but a bra and jogger pants.

The thing is, I wore the same outfit in different colors to a festival a month before. However, it was in that moment that I became aware of what I was wearing and what that says about my self-esteem, and how I view my scoliosis. I put those outfits on without thinking about my scars or whether someone would make fun of me. I’ve become such a confident person and didn’t even notice it until last week. I’m beginning to feel like confident 13-year-old me again, but wiser and with more responsibilities. I’ve come such a long way. I’m so proud of myself. ♦