Fatma

The continuous days at home are becoming slightly tedious. Luckily, I bought Juno on DVD, so I guess I have something to look forward to. Juno is definitely one of those films I can watch over and over without getting bored.

I’ve decided to spend more time in my room because I’m constantly getting into arguments with my parents and my sister. I love my sister with all of my heart and I hate fighting with her, but we always end up arguing. Most of the time, it’s my fault. She’ll stop talking to me for a few days, we’ll reconcile and then we’ll argue again. I’m tired of it and I’m starting to feel extremely drained.

Another thing that’s been on my mind recently, is the talk that my dad requested, which we eventually had. During 10-minutes, Dad basically told me to act like my sister, dress like my sister, and adopt the same attitude as my sister. My parents don’t realize how hurtful they can be. Why are they trying to change me? I like being comfortable at home and dancing to Lil Yachty songs, so why would they want me to pretend like I’m quiet and shy? I love the way I am. I would think they would understand that, since I’m so uncomfortable and shy at school, they would let me be hyper and happy at home. But sometimes I honestly can’t be bothered to think about this any more. They ignore me most of the time anyway because they’re so busy with work, so they must think that my problems are too minuscule to acknowledge. I’m fine with that, to be honest. I’m not going to be mad at my parents for working hard.

Also, I’ve put a sign on my bedroom door that says, “If the door is closed, I’m not wearing a T-shirt. Don’t come in!” Although I’ve done this so that no one comes in, I rarely ever take my T-shirt off because I’m still scared that someone will ignore the sign and see me half-naked. But at least my family is extra careful before walking into my room.

Although locking myself up in my room makes me feel even more lonely, at least I don’t have to deal with my family’s negative energy. ♦