Keianna

The day of my little brother’s birthday party, I wasn’t feeling my best. Although my outfit was chosen and perfected days in advance, and my curls FINALLY looked the way I wanted them to, something was off. And I couldn’t shake the feeling, despite compliments and positive comments from others.

So, I did what the stereotypical angsty teenager would do and locked myself in my bedroom. I turned my mirror to face the wall and started a YouTube video binge. That was going fine until my thoughts got in the way—as always.

SCENE ONE

Me lying on my bed watching the people at BuzzFeed doing something odd but cool.

Me: Dang working for BuzzFeed must be so cool I’d love to do that.

My brain: Yeah but maybe we should be working out why you’re feeling so off.

Me: I mean, I guess, but BuzzFeed employs a lot of inspiring people of color and I’m really here for that. They also have a lot of videos dealing with topics you don’t hear discussed too often.

My brain: Do they have one about loving and treating yourself right?

Me: Lol, yeah right! Here let’s watch it.

END SCENE

Oh. OH. OK, my brain might be onto something here. I don’t treat myself as nicely as I should. I stress out, procrastinate, then belittle myself because of it. That’s not good at all. I’m a gorgeous princess and no one, not even myself, is going to tell me otherwise.

SCENE TWO

Me rejoining the party with a smile on my face.

Me: Grandma, will you take a picture of me? I look great.

END SCENE

This week, when I’ve walked by the mirror I haven’t avoided my own gaze, or shifted awkwardly while trying to decide if the outfit I’m wearing looks OK on me. Instead, I’ve smiled at myself and I’ve even taken a few selfies for the first time, well…ever. I’ve looked nice every day this week; I’m sure I’ve looked nice my entire life but this week, I believed it. ♦