Bra care

The unfortunate truth is that bras are delicate as hell. Most of them are made of fragile fabrics and materials like Spandex that demand their own special care routine. I like to throw mine in a durable mesh garment bag and into the washing machine for a round on the delicates/gentle cycle, but you can also opt to wash your bras by hand with a little bit of detergent made for delicate garments and some warm water. The key is to prevent a lot of unnecessary twisting and turning and squishing and stretching that might wreck your bra and shorten its life. Bras can be expensive, so try and get as much wear as you can out of each one.

A word of warning: If you, like me, never seem to have the time to hand wash your bras, make sure you only wash your bras with other delicate garments in the washing machine and, if they’re padded, take all that extra material out before putting your bra through the spin cycle! The finicky bits and pieces of bras—underwires, padding, elastic, and metal, just to name a few—are super vulnerable to damage from the rougher, more durable fabrics in most other clothes. Care when washing your bras to will keep them functional and in good form for as long as possible!

When you’re finished cleaning your bras, air-dry them. Hang them up or lay them flat on a towel—it’s up to you—but never ever ever put them in the dryer. Trust me, it won’t turn out well. Once they’ve been nicely air-dried, you can fold each bra in half, with one cup inside the other, and store them wherever you’d like.

Another good tip when it comes to maximizing the number of times you’ll be able to don your favorite bras: rotate them! Wearing the same bra over and over can stretch out the elastic and cut down on how long it’ll last, so switch it up every couple days to keep a good thing going.

To wear or not to wear?

The decision to wear—or not wear—a bra is super personal. It’s nobody’s business but your own. There are a whole bunch of reason why some people choose to go one way or the other, and some people (like me) like to flip-flop between both on the regular. There are a ton of options for both choices—here are a few of them.

Bras

Bras come in about a billion and two different styles for every occasion imaginable, but here are some common types:

• T-shirt bra: Hella comfortable (as long as it fits properly) and designed for being worn under—you guessed it!—T-shirts. Inconspicuous and discreet.
• Sports bra: Great for working out, but equally fantastic for any day when you don’t feel like dealing with the fussiness that sometimes comes with wearing a “regular” bra.
• Strapless: Ideal for a lot of evening dresses and strap-free tops. If you go for a strapless bra, though, keep in mind that it’s crucial for it to fit you correctly so you don’t have to shimmy ’n’ shake every five minutes trying to yank yours back up to where it’s supposed to be and focus on what matters: looking fly as hell.
• Push-up: These bras “amplify” your chest volume by using padding to push up again what you’ve already got, creating the appearance of cleavage. It’s everyday magic!
  Padded: Not all padded bras are push-up bras—there are varying levels of padding a bra can have, so experiment to see what you like the most.

• Soft cup/triangle/bralette: Underwire- and padding-free, they’re a comfy choice, especially for smaller chests that don’t need the heavy-duty lifting of a lot of standard bras.
• Bras with underwires: OK, this isn’t really a “type,” per se—but it encompasses a huge variety of different bra styles that have little wires embedded beneath the cups for support. Some people really appreciate the extra support underwires provide and some don’t—try out both and see which is best for you!

Braless

Sometimes saying “screw it” to bras entirely is a way better option—you don’t have to worry about straps and hooks, and it can be a relief to prance around without any kind of restriction. If you decide that wearing a bra isn’t really up your alley, there are a bunch of other undergarment-y adventures, too. You can wear one, none, some, or all of the following beneath your clothes (and more!):

• Camisoles
• Tank tops
• T-shirts
• …or nothing at all!

Extra Pointers

• If your bra straps keep slipping, tighten them! They can be adjusted using the slide-y metal bits at the back of the straps.
• Alternately, sometimes you can’t exactly shorten your shoulder straps enough for them to fit comfortably. In that case, you’ll have to pin ’em. I like to fold part of the strap in on itself using small safety pins, but be careful not to stab yourself by accident!
• If your bra is the correct size for you and it’s still straining your shoulders and back, try out a style that has thicker straps and a wider band. These can be more comfortable to wear because the weight of your chest is more evenly distributed across the extra fabric, and it can alleviate a ton stress on your body!
• If, during the day, wearing your bra becomes unbearably uncomfortable for any reason, take it off! Go for it. There’s no reason for underwear to cause you pain or discomfort, and you’ve got enough to deal with already without suffering through the distraction of an irritating undergarment.
• Sometimes you’ll come across THE PERFECT BRA—it looks cute, it fits like a glove, it doesn’t scratch or pinch, it’s squarely in your price range—and then you bring it home, put it on and…it looks awkward under your favorite shirts, the seams and cups don’t make you feel like a complete 10/10, or the color makes it impossible to wear on more serious occasions. The only way to really avoid this one is to try on your prospective bras in the store—it can get tiring really quickly, but it’s the only way to make sure your bra really is perfect for you. Keep in mind, too, that even if you think your bra looks a little weird under your blouse, I’m sure you’re still rocking it.
• If you have any questions at any time when you’re trying to figure out your bra size or what bra styles and models are out there or what bra to wear with what outfit or anything—anything at all—ask! Ask a close friend, The Internet, or anyone who is experienced with bras to help you. When I went to get my first bra at 13, I was so lost and confused by everything, but I felt too embarrassed to ask any of the sales assistants around me any of my questions. Turns out way more people than I thought were happy to help me, and all I needed to do was ask. So, ask! Don’t worry and fret in silence. The answers are out there!
• Sometimes you might wanna wear a “nude bra”—most stores tend to carry a pale kind of beige color for all their “nude” bras, but we all know that there are many skin colors and tones. If you can’t find any stores in your area that carry the right tone for you, there are some great online brands that have your back: Nubian Skin makes bras specifically for people of color, and a lot of brands provide multiple colorways for their products that might be less commonly available in-store.
• Bluestockings Boutique is a great one-stop shop that caters to queer people and donates a portion of its sales to a different LGBTQIA+ charity each month.
• Above all else, enjoy whatever you choose to wear. Fashion—all fashion—is meant to be fun! So go forth, babes, and whatever you’re trotting out, OWN IT!

Even after all this, you may have unanswered questions—bras are complicated! They’re weird and puzzling, but they don’t have to be SCARY. Think of it this way: They’re just a contraption that holds up your junk, or makes you feel comfortable, or keeps your chest from bouncin’ all up in your face when you’re trying to kick ass and take names. Now that you’re equipped with ironclad knowledge of the basic ins and outs—and well on your way to becoming a lingerie master in your own right—go find a bra that works for you, or do away with them altogether. Whatever works! ♦