Britney

I am so attached to the freedom afforded me by these humid July days that I don’t even want to think about the upcoming heaviness of 10 months of school. I just want to enjoy being a teenager, and school isn’t really helpful in that regard. On the other hand, summer’s freedom is mostly theoretical for me—I’m not so good at taking advantage of it, despite my lofty plans.

I took a color personality quiz this week, out of pure curiosity, the way people have five-dollar readings with supposed psychics on the street just to see what they’ll say. My results were all too correct. An excerpt from the section entitled “Stress Sources”: “She needs constant attention and encouragement, but she is getting neither of those things, and it is bringing her down. She needs to escape the situation, but feels helpless to do anything or make a decision toward a solution.” The truth of it makes me uneasy. I often feel like people in my life owe me certain things (yes, like attention). I don’t even like talking about this—it’s uncomfortable to admit these faults in my thought process.

The other sections of the quiz made me realize that the stagnation I feel every summer is not something imposed upon me, but something I do to myself. All of this time alone has led to a lot of introspection, and the only thing left to do is actually change myself for the better. I need to get out more and talk to more people. This year, I hope I finally do it. ♦