Spring break is almost here and for once I feel whole. I have plans, I have people that I love that I can spend my time with, I have myself. I don’t feel as unfulfilled as I did before, and everything seems to be reflecting that. Everything that I want to do seems to be more purposeful now. I used to feel lost in the world, in my mind—and while that hasn’t completely stopped, it hasn’t made me feel like life is being wasted on me. I like feeling wanted, especially when the person fueling that desire is myself.
There are so many emotions flowing through me that I just want to capture them all in piles of mixtapes and playlists that I make copies of for my best friends and in poems and in the chicken-scratch phrases that I write in the corners of all of my notebooks. I feel more in control of my life, and less like a bystander on an aimless path. ♦