Dear Diary

February 19, 2014

Some lies are truer than the truth.

Ruby

I’m in Florida, on the beach, writing a short story about a cowardly knight and his fearless squire. There’s a blizzard at home that my friends are living in, and I’m drinking water that tastes like chlorine.

Two boys come up to me.

“What are you reading?” they ask. I put on my best English accent.

A Clockwork Orange.

“Is it good?”

“It’s pretty fucked up. But yeah, it’s good.”

“What’s your name?”

“Viola,” I say. “I live in the mountains of Sapa, Vietnam.”

I tell them about my pet cobra and other lies. I tell them that nobody in my family is English, but that my parents faked the accent until I was seven so I’d pick it up.

I had control, and I was changing the worlds of these three teenagers. In their world, the girl on the beach with blue hair was Viola from Vietnam, with hundreds of adventures to tell.

I wasn’t Ruby, a girl on lots of medications who couldn’t handle public school, who’d lost most of her friends, who was bad at riding a bike, who had gained a lot of weight this year, who’d spent much more time in hospitals than in Sapa, Vietnam.

A weight was lifted. Lying is a beautiful art. It is acting and control and writing. It is more than saying you’re someone else. It is becoming whatever you wish to become. ♦

Page

1 2 3 4

6 Comments

  • rhymeswithorange February 19th, 2014 10:55 PM

    Lovely, all!!

  • kellyissofab February 19th, 2014 11:36 PM

    Ruby’s are always the best. I often only come to Rookie on Wednesdays just to read her diary entry. Her prose is beautiful and she always has such witty and insightful things to say.

    Keep on keeping on Ruby. I’m always sending you good vibes.

    -Kelly

  • Tiger February 19th, 2014 11:59 PM

    these girls are fucking amazing.

  • Rebdomine February 20th, 2014 4:46 AM

    Ruby, your diaries are one of the best things about Rookie. I’m rooting you on <3

  • Bex_cygnet February 20th, 2014 7:07 AM

    Naomi- awesome. Blown away by the ease with which you draw your readers through a rabbit warren of nuanced thoughts and ideas with clarity. Your entries are so entertaining!

  • sonnentanz February 20th, 2014 9:06 AM

    Naomi, what you said about projecting our fantasies onto others really made me think. I often do this with new people I just met, and there is definitely something wonderful about it. However, when I start getting to know them better and see what they really are like, I tend to get disappointed, because they don’t live up to the fabulous fantasy in my head. This doesn’t only hurt me, but them as well. It’s so hard to find a healthy balance.

Add Your Comment

House Rules
  1. Your display name will be the name you use to log in, and the name that people see when you comment on posts. For safety reasons, no last names, addresses, or other personal information are allowed to be part of your display name. Use your first name only or a nickname. (Any display names with last names or addresses will be deleted, and you will have to re-register.)
  2. Don’t be a jerk, ok?
  3. All comments on Rookie are moderated. Please be patient—we’ll do our best to keep up, but sometimes it may take us a bit to get to all of them.
  4. We reserve the right to reject comments for any reason.
Characters left:
Characters left: