Zach and I broke up on Friday. I’m sad, but I know it was for the best. We both saw it coming. We like(d?) each other very, very much, but something seemed missing. We had nothing to talk about, and we had different expectations for each other. It hurt to be so distant from someone I cared about, and I think it hurt him that I was upset by things that weren’t his fault, like us having little in common.
It didn’t end in a fight. We texted a little bit that night, and agreed that maybe when we’re both in better places, we can try again. I saw him over the weekend. He pretended not to even notice me and seemed to make a big deal about hugging my female friends. I wasn’t jealous, but it made me miss him. It was kind of sad and awkward to have him around, but not be able to speak to him.
We have band practice tomorrow, and I’m not sure if he’ll ignore me, or pretend we never even were a couple and just be “normal.” There are only the three of us, so I hope it’s not the former, as that would be extremely uncomfortable for all of us.
We’re obviously not going to be friends right away, but I want us to be eventually. I don’t want to lose him completely, because I think he’s fantastic. Also, all of our friends are mutual, and I would never try to divide the group. Not to mention Llama Sanchez. I just wish things could be normal.
I don’t regret our relationship. I’m glad he was my first kiss, my first real boyfriend, and my first breakup. I feel like I chose wisely. ♦