Dear Diary

January 2, 2013

Turning the page.

Ruby

My best friend’s name is Megan. I met her in preschool and we were friends as little kids, but I don’t really remember that, except for how my sister peed on her porch and my brother pooped in her backyard on the same day.

The summer before eighth grade, I met her again. We connected pretty much instantly. We both liked fashion and good music and Rookie (I had just discovered it), we were both finding out about feminism, we both had problems with our sisters, and we both played instruments. I had never really known someone who had things in common with me before.

And then I moved and came to her school and met her friends. A few of them didn’t like me, but a couple did. And now I go to school with my best friend, so it doesn’t really matter how many friends I have.

I’ve always had trouble making friends and picking up on social cues. Having one close friend is the best, I’ve learned. When someone declares you Best Friend, it means you’re almost like family, and the friendship is nearly unconditional. It means that you understand both the vices and the virtues in each other and accept them.

I had always convinced myself that friendships like that don’t exist, that I’m not Lizzie McGuire, that I will never have a friend whose house I can walk into without knocking on the door or making plans. I never thought I could be comfortable around someone without scaring them away with my weirdness. Best friends are good like that.

We have sleepovers at least once a week, and we stay up late talking about school and family and boys and what we want in our lives. We listen to ABBA and do our hair in the bathroom together.

There was no specific event that sparked this diary—I’ve just been thinking about Megan and really appreciating her recently. She has way more friends than I do, and I don’t think I’m her only best friend, but that’s not really important. Friendship is not as overrated as I convinced myself it was. In fact, it’s pretty much the best thing ever. ♦

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16 Comments

  • MissKnowItAll January 2nd, 2013 7:13 PM

    Can I submit drawings for the diaries or anything in general to go with articles Anaheed?

    • Anaheed January 2nd, 2013 11:31 PM

      The only drawings we use for diaries are Caitlin’s visual diaries, but anyone who wants to submit drawings can send them to submissions@rookiemag.com.

  • lylsoy January 2nd, 2013 7:47 PM

    Nandi, I love you. You can have my mascara, always. Butonlyif I crawl under the cupboard…
    http://aureliabode-model.tumblr.com/
    PS: I can’t wait for this new year with rookie <3

  • Promesa January 2nd, 2013 8:17 PM

    My “best friend” isn’t talking to me either, she says I’ve changed too much…

    littleswayingdaisy.tumblr.com

  • Laura Lemon January 2nd, 2013 8:24 PM

    My personal philosophy has always been that having one close best friend is better than having a bunch of friends. And having a few best friends that are your best friends for different reasons is Literally the Best Thing Ever. Especially when said friends happen to be Potterheads, Sherlockians, Whovians and Hitchhikers.

    • moonchild January 2nd, 2013 9:20 PM

      TRUTH.

    • MegW January 2nd, 2013 9:24 PM

      I agree! I share a lot of nerdy things with my very best friend. (She recently turned me into a Whovian!)

  • DANNI January 2nd, 2013 8:26 PM

    i always feel like i under-appreciate my friends and it’s really awkward because there’s no handbook that tells you the right amount of gratitude to show and what’s kissing ass and what’s not.

    and to anyone that’s like ‘scoff eighth grade is nothing’, as a fellow nyc eighth grader going to a ‘gifted and talented’ school (aw, how cute), IT IS INTENSELY STRESSFUL. (i think i can speak for britney on this) OUR FATE IS BEING REVEALED IN FEBRUARY! the high schools admissions process is a huge deal, and so are accelerated classes and every snooty-nosed fart that’s like ‘omg 96 is a fail’ when you’re sitting at your desk with a big fat 96 in front of you. (maybe that is just at my school) (yeah)

  • makeawish3653 January 2nd, 2013 8:48 PM

    Nandi, your entries make me smile :D

  • babyybat January 2nd, 2013 9:09 PM

    nandi, you are amazing, d-dawg.

  • Eryn January 2nd, 2013 9:12 PM

    Caitlin, I love your diary, as always. Naomi, you write so beautifully! And Ruby, best friend appreciation is great! I think I’ll write mine a sappy text now! Katherine, escaping to the wilderness sounds nice right about now. Britney, I sinccerely wish you the best with friends and school! Nandi, your entry made me laugh out loud.

    http://fashionfledge.blogspot.ca/

  • llamalina January 2nd, 2013 10:14 PM

    Caitlin, that collage is so, so gorgeous.

    “I feel withdrawn right now, like my orbit is getting smaller, moving inward, farther and farther away from everybody else’s.”

    Naomi, I completely know how you feel. I’ve been so lonely lately, like I need to curl up into myself. I’ve been spending a lot of time alone, just trying to reorganize everything and think.

    Nandi, you’re amazing and hilarious.

    http://llamalina.blogspot.com

  • arorab January 3rd, 2013 5:43 AM

    Naomi im feeling the same at the the moment and its terrible

  • WitchesRave January 3rd, 2013 9:36 AM

    I will arise and go now, for always night and day
    I hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore;
    While I stand on the roadway, or on the pavements grey,
    I hear it in the deep heart’s core.

    Yeats is a beautiful poet, I just wish i didnt have to study his poems in school, I hate analyzing poetry in class..

    witches-rave.tumblr.com

  • junebug January 3rd, 2013 10:48 PM

    Britney: the only 8th grader who makes a casual reference to Sisyphus in a diary entry.