Elizabeth and Madalyn, ages 18 and 17, respectively, have created their own little friendship paradise in Pomona, CA, with its own language and everything. Their universe is ruled by ice cream and dolphins and music and love. ♥ ♥ ♥
SUBJECT: FRIEND CRUSH
My friend Madalyn rules so hard. She is my best friend because we are exactly the same but we never bore each other. We like the same music and movies, but even if we don’t sometimes it’s OK because we can turn each other on to new things. I want to study film and she wants to study journalism, so we joke that she is going to write a book about me and I’m going to make a movie about her. We call ourselves the Dream Team. We use sea-animal analogies for a lot of things in life. I like to make Madalyn fake awards and certificates and print them out along with dumb pictures of us making faces to put in my room. We are really good at dumb faces! When we feel sad or lame we reassure each other that we actually rock and we shouldn’t feel bad since we have each other. I love Madalyn so much and I don’t know what I’d do without her. I have the biggest friend crush on her ever. We’re going to graduate soon and go to different schools and not spend every second together, but I know we’ll always be friends.
ROOKIE Did you and Madalyn meet in high school?
ELIZABETH [crusher] We met in middle school, because we were both in ASB—Associate Student Body. We put on dances and stuff. It was really fun, because instead of just making posters for dances and stuff, Madalyn and I would, like, put information for our events on little necklaces or spoons and hand them out to people, or we’d put paper on the walls with really fine print, so people would have to go up close to read it.
Why do you think you were you able to get so close to her?
It was just that we could talk about anything. With my other friends, I would refrain from telling them certain things—not because I didn’t think they would understand, I just didn’t think it was necessary. But then with Madalyn I wanted to tell her everything, and I could tell her anything. Literally anything.
In the Friend Crushes, that’s a thing that everybody always says: “I can talk to her about anything.” And while I understand what it means to have a best friend that you can talk to about anything, I guess I don’t get why that’s always such a big deal in these conversations. Like, why does that feel so special? Is it that you don’t want to tell other people everything because you don’t want to feel vulnerable around them, and it’s unusual to find a person that you feel like you can show your vulnerable or weak parts to? Or is it that there’s finally someone that you care about enough to want to share that stuff with?
I think it’s a little bit of both. With other people, people I’m not that close with, I probably wouldn’t feel comfortable throwing everything out there and telling them everything that’s on my mind, because I’d be worried that they’d take it the wrong way or something. But with Madalyn, if I were to say something, I feel like she would really understand what I meant, because she knows me so well.
So it’s about being understood by somebody.
Yeah. Like I could say something that maybe might not make sense to someone else, and they might think, That’s weird—what are you talking about? But if I tell Madalyn, she’ll be like, “Oh, I get what you’re saying.” Or even if she doesn’t get it, she’ll try to get it, and she’ll see me a little bit better, I think, than other people.
Ah, OK, I get it. You said in your email that you guys use sea-animal analogies for a lot of things in life. Can you give me an example?
Um, I think the biggest one that we use is probably dolphins. Did you know that dolphins rape people?
Yes! I do know that! And they try to kill each other too sometimes!
They are murderers and rapists!
Yeah! So we were really appalled by that. Everybody thinks dolphins are so cute, you know? But they rape people. So dolphin started out as a derogatory term for people who thought they were cute, or things that people though were cute but we knew were really like gross, or dirty, or like just not cute.
Like sometimes couples—you know how there are those really gross couples that are just like right in your face?
We would just be like, “They’re being big dolphins right now. They think they’re really cute but they’re not.” Or, Madalyn really likes those dogs—corgis. I think they look really gross. I think they’re just unproportional.
Are they the ones with the giant heads and the stubby little legs?
They are really crazy-looking. They look like two different animals were cut apart and then stapled together the wrong way.
Madalyn thinks they’re cute, but I’m just like, “No, they’re dolphins. You think they’re cute but they’re not!” But then [the term] kind of transformed into not necessarily derogatory, because sometimes we’ll refer to each other as dolphins, when we’re feeling really gross and overly feel-y.
Overly what? Feel-y?
When we’re being really dumb. I don’t know.
You mean like emotionally feel-y?
Yeah, when we’re like auuuughehnmmmmm.
Did you guys just graduate?
Congratulations! Where are you going to college?
Where is Madalyn going?
She’s going to UC Riverside.
Are they far from each other?
She’s gonna be commuting, so she’ll still be in Pomona. UCSB is about two hours driving, four hours on a train.
That’s not so bad. In your email you told us that you and Madalyn joke that you’re gonna make a movie about her, and she’s gonna write a book about you. If you made a movie about Madalyn, what would it be like?
It would be about her rise to stardom as a writer. She would go on this long trek around the world to find inspiration or something, and I’d add little animations of the things she’s writing about that would follow her around. No matter how much I’d want it to be a gangster movie or make her character insane or something, it would probably resemble more of a Wes Anderson film just because I like him and I feel like it would give Madalyn’s life the right amount of cute while still being emotional and heartfelt.
Here’s the gushy, mushy part of the interview. What do you love most about Madalyn?
Her sense of humor. She’s really funny, and we’re really funny together. We can do absolutely nothing and have the most fun. And she’s really sweet. Sometimes I feel like I talk too much, but she always listens to me, and that makes me feel nice and loved and stuff.
What do you know about her that other people don’t realize?
I feel like a lot of people don’t realize how sensitive she is. When we’re at school it’s us against them, you know? We felt really isolated in school.
I don’t know. We didn’t really have many friends. We were each other’s friends, you know? And so I think that both of us sort of put up a front of “I don’t care, I don’t need this, I’m just going to do my work and I’m not gonna worry about what other people feel about me.” I think we give off the impression that we don’t have many feelings, but deep down we’re really sensitive, and we have a lot of feelings.
Is there anything else you want to say about Madalyn, anything I missed?
She’s a really good friend. I can count on her. If I needed a kidney, she would give me one of hers. Maybe she wouldn’t have a compatible blood type, so she couldn’t donate to me, but she’d probably look for one for me.
She’s gonna feel really bad now if that happens and she says no, because this article will be on the internet.
I know. She better find me a kidney!
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ROOKIE Hi, Madalyn. How’s your day so far?
MADALYN [crushee] It’s good—I mean, I haven’t really done much.
Because you’re on summer vacation, right?
Yeah. I’m actually going to go see Elizabeth soon.
What are you guys gonna do?
Actually…do you know the band Arctic Monkeys?
I know of them.
Well, just last year was when they released Suck It and See—their most recent album—so it’s like their quote-unquote birthday. So we’re gonna, like, celebrate it, I guess.
What are you gonna do to celebrate?
When I go over her house, we really love making ice cream. She has this really cool blender that makes everything. It’s like a superblender—it make soup and it makes ice cream, too, so she was gonna make ice cream and we were just gonna listen to Arctic Monkeys’ most recent album and just like dance and party.
What kind of ice cream do you make in honor of Arctic Monkeys?
Usually we just make fruity ice cream, because her parents always buy frozen fruits in bags.
Elizabeth said that you’re both pretty guarded around other people usually. How did she break through that wall in you?
Well, we met through Associate Student Body, and gradually we found out that we had a lot in common. We also had some classes together, and we figured out that we like a lot of the same things in regards to music and movies and books and stuff. Then I started going to her house more often. Her parents know me really well now. Sometimes her mom calls me and tells me things.
Elizabeth’s having a graduation party this weekend, and her mom didn’t know who to invite, because we don’t really talk to a lot of people—so she called me and asked, “Can you invite more people?” I was like, “Oh, oops, we don’t really talk to that many people; what am I supposed to do?”
Tell me about dolphins.
We use the term dolphin in order to convey our feelings, because dolphins are gross, and sometimes feelings are gross. Sometimes we’ll say that boys are dolphins, because boys can be gross too.
Why are dolphins gross to you?
When you look at them, their face is like really weird. And then they also rape people.
Yeah, Elizabeth and I talked about that at some length.
They’re the worst ever. They’re as bad as humans.
This is the most anti-dolphin article ever published on Rookie.
I wonder if anyone will be offended.
Oh, I’m sure someone will be! Can you tell me about the awards and certificates that Elizabeth makes for you?
She actually just made me one yesterday, for ice cream.
Do you have plans for how you’re going to stay close with Elizabeth when you guys are going to different schools?
We’ve gone over it. Maybe every other weekend or every month if there’s a show or some kind of concert that we want to go see, maybe we can meet in L.A. Or maybe we could take a little road trip and drive up to Santa Barbara then take the train to San Francisco and hang out there for a weekend or something if we’re not busy with school stuff. Elizabeth will have to take the train, because she doesn’t have her driver’s license yet, but I can drive.
I think she needs to get her license, because that train ride is gonna be long.
She has her permit. I ask her all the time, “Hey, when are you gonna get your license?” and she just looks away.
I have to go get my driver’s license this week, and I’m freaked out about it.
It’s not too bad. It really depends on where you take your test. Where I live the test is really easy. It’s only about 10 minutes. If you practice, I think you’ll do well.
Thank you so much! Elizabeth says that you guys joke that she’s gonna make a movie about you and you’re gonna write a book about her. If you wrote a book about her, what would it be like?
It would document how she’s gonna do her movie about me.
Yeah. And [it would be] about our friendship, probably. And about us throughout the years and how much we love the things we love, and why.
What do you love most about Elizabeth?
She’s a really cool person. Sometimes I think she’s so much cooler than me, because she knows so much more about film or books or music. She teaches me a lot about that stuff, stuff that I don’t know. Or she’ll talk about interviews I haven’t seen yet. She shares all that stuff with me. She makes me feel better about myself, because sometimes I feel like I’m lame and she’s the greatest person ever.
What makes her the greatest person ever?
She’s really kind, and she really means things when she says them. Also, if she really wants you to do something, you do it, just because she is so nice about the way she asks for it. She’s really convincing in the way she puts her words.
What does she do that just makes you shake your head?
On the topic of boys, she’ll tell me to be really, really outgoing, and I’m like, “No, I’m not gonna do that.” And then when I tell her to do something in relation to boys, she’s all, “No! What are you talking about? I can’t do that! You’re dumb!”
When is she most like a dolphin?
When we talk about ourselves, we kind of feel dolphin because we’re just like, “Man, we’re so great, how come we don’t have friends? It must be because we’re too great to have friends, huh?” [Laughs]
Elizabeth told me that if she ever needed a kidney, you would give her one of yours. And that if your blood types don’t match, you will find one for her. True or false?
Yay! Happy ending.
(Interviews conducted by Anaheed.)
To nominate someone you love platonically, and INTENSELY, for a future Friend Crush, please send ONE email (NOT A HUNDRED EMAILS PLEASE) with both of your names, ages, and pictures, and a paragraph or two explaining what makes her so wonderful, to firstname.lastname@example.org, and write Friend Crush in the subject line.