Fun

My Top Five Cryptid Crushes

When Marie pitched a story about cryptozoology, we were like, “OK! What’s cryptozoology?”

Being a gal with a diverse assortment of interests, I like to wander occasionally from my more commonly known pursuits of fashion and film to delve deep into the world of the mysterious and unknown. Yes my friends, I am a HUUUUGE CRYPTOZOOLOGY NERD! What’s cryptozoology, you ask? Cryptozoology is the study of hidden animals. This includes the legendary ones, like bigfoot and the the Loch Ness Monster! Some may laugh at the idea that creatures like these exist, but that’s when I like to remind them that DINOSAURS USED TO ROAM THE EARTH. Doesn’t that trip you out from time to time? Skeptics should also take into consideration that new species of animals are being discovered EVERY SINGLE DAY. So there could be a unipeg (unicorn/pegasus hybrid aka my favorite “animal” in the fourth grade) straight chillin’ in a cave somewhere and we don’t even know! Here are my current five cryptid crushes!

1. Thunderbirds are giant bird-like creatures with razor-sharp beaks and wingspans up to 20 feet. They were first said to have been seen in 1890, when two cowboys shot and killed one, then carried its carcass into town, where it was nailed to a barn, wings spread, and photographed. This supposed picture is like a sub-mystery of the whole Thunderbird thing because tons of people claim to have once seen it in a book, but there is no photographic evidence ANYWHERE (it is not the one above, which is a staged shot). False mass memory or conspiracy? My thoughts: if Argentavis was real, why couldn’t the Thunderbird be? OMG GIANT BIRDS ARE SCARY!


2. The Beast of Gévaudan was a wolf-like creature, as big as a horse, with hooves, that terrorized a province in south-central France in the 1760s. The attacks became such a problem that King Louis XV even sent professional hunters to track down the animals, but had no luck. A couple of years later, a local hunter named Jean Chastel slayed a creature whose stomach was found to contain human remains. Later on, it was suggested that Chastel had used a silver bullet to kill the beast. WEREWOLF MUCH? Some cryptozoologists think it was a weird wolf hybrid, while other nerds think it was a living mesonychid. More than 100 deaths, and many more injuries, were attributed to these creatures. Whatever this thing was, it was a real asshole…


3. OK, don’t freak out. The Naree Pon are tiny humanoid creatures from Thailand that are believed to be a cross between an animal and a plant. Buddhist legend says they were beautiful women that grew from a tree like fruit, then would jump off the branch to sing and dance for a couple of weeks and then shrivel up and die. Two Naree Pon carcasses are on display at a monastery near Bangkok (booking my plane ticket now). Supposedly, they have been tested showing that they have hearts, lungs and other internal organs but no bones. ::cue Macaulay Culkin Home Alone face::


4. Mothman scurrs the crap outta me. Ever since I saw that creepy Richard Gere movie The Mothman Prophecies, I have been scared of Los Mothyman!!! In 1966 and 1967, residents of Point Pleasant, West Virginia, and surrounding areas reported seeing a seven-foot-tall human-like creature with wings and glowing red eyes! Um…WHAT? What’s also freaky is after the collapse of the Silver Bridge, no more sightings were reported, causing many people to think that these incidents are related. Is Mothman a harbinger of tragedy???


5. The lusca is a gigantic sea creature living in the bottom of the ocean. Have you heard of blue holes? They are underwater sinkholes and caves found in various parts of the world. The lusca is believed to live inside of the ones in the Bahamas. Now, let’s think about this for a mome. There are so many strange creatures down in the deep blue sea, which is basically like another outer space, so why couldn’t an insane SEA MONSTER be hanging out in there? Cryptozoologists actually believe the lusca is a giant undiscovered octopus. (I had a joke about calamari here but realized that didn’t make sense because that is SQUID :( )

And that is that! Any questions? (I know, I have TONS.) If you want to be (or already are) a crypto-nerd like moi, I must suggest picking up Cryptozoology A-Z, a handy guide that I have constantly referred to over the years! Happy hunting! ♦

48 Comments

  • Georgie March 29th, 2012 3:12 PM

    THIS IS SUCH A COOL POST AND EXACTLY THE REASON WHY I FRICKIN’ LOVE ROOKIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • heyjeannie March 29th, 2012 3:16 PM

    If any Boston area Rookie readers are interested in cryptozoology, they should visit the Greater Boston Bigfoot Research Institute in Roxbury! http://826boston.org/content/591

    • flowerchild49 March 29th, 2012 3:49 PM

      No way! I go to school in Boston. What an absolute gem.

  • Fortune_Goddess March 29th, 2012 3:24 PM

    Wow, I love this!! “…while other nerds think it was a living mesonychid.” cracked me up! :) Love ya, Marie. You’re so great!

  • neenah March 29th, 2012 3:29 PM

    Great read! Also one of the best illustrations for an article yet (no offense to the collage masterminds of Rookie, you are all awesome!). I think it would be a most excellent t-shirt :)

  • Laia March 29th, 2012 3:41 PM

    I LOVE THIS.

    also EVERYTHING CRAZY lives underwater man, and we’ll just NEVER KNOW.

    (or you know, give it 20 years or so)

  • Juniper March 29th, 2012 3:46 PM

    Where I live people are obsessed with chupacabra sightings!

  • decemberbaby March 29th, 2012 3:51 PM

    These are amazing. I’m totally showing this article to my little sister: she wants to be a chupacabra when she grows up.

    • SunshineJilly April 3rd, 2012 4:30 PM

      You should tell her she’s AWESOME and that that is THE GREATEST GOAL EVER.

  • isabellehungryghost March 29th, 2012 3:53 PM

    lusca? sounds weird… i like. especially becaues its a sea monster!

    http://therestlesswillstay.blogspot.de/

  • AllieBee March 29th, 2012 4:00 PM

    If you’ve actually seen an animal that has a questionable existence, how do you get people to believe you?! I’ve wondered that for a loooong time… Especially after watching the iBigfoot episode of iCarly…

    http://thatalisonwonderland.blogspot.com/

    • missblack March 29th, 2012 4:42 PM

      hahaha “Those squirrels aren’t wrestling.”

      I TOTALLY BELIEVE IN THE BEAVECOON!!!

      • AllieBee March 29th, 2012 6:14 PM

        OH MY GOSH. If I wasn’t so indoorsy I would hunt the beavecoon every day of my life. Every. Day. I love Spencer!

  • Dylan March 29th, 2012 4:05 PM

    THIS IS SO COOOL HOLY CRAP

  • KinuKinu March 29th, 2012 4:12 PM

    I am totally a nerd for this stuff!!I just love it.I will say that I don’t believe in Bigfoot.It seems the most fake to me.I think all the rest are pretty possible ,though.Remember that gigantic squid they found a little while ago?It was like 8 feet long or some crazy thing like that.*queue Home Alone face*Oh and those under water rollie pollies that eat diseased whales on the ocean floor?We have know IDEA what’s out there(even though we pretend to)so this makes it all the more possible.I love this so much it’s unbelievable.Thank you for NERD HEAVEN.

  • nessa_edith March 29th, 2012 4:32 PM

    I did a class presentation on Cryptozoology when I was in grade 6 so this is retro cool to me :P

  • meghang March 29th, 2012 4:37 PM

    omg YES. fashion, films, aaannddd… cryptozoology. pretty much sums me up.
    other favorite cryptids: shadow people! mongolian death worm!
    and mermaids, of course

    • minnie mcgregor March 30th, 2012 12:39 AM

      Mermaids for sure. My family are descended from mermaids. I wish I knew where my tail was.

  • missblack March 29th, 2012 4:40 PM

    OHMIGOD this is so awesome and so TERRIFYING I’m definitely going to be on the alert for Mothman now.

    Also, those Naree Pon things are freaking weird. (but still I kinda wish I was one. I imagine I’d spend my days clinging to a tree, swaying with the breeze, and maybe seducing the odd huntsman here and there.)

    Little&Trivial

  • ShockHorror March 29th, 2012 4:45 PM

    Eeeeee! I love these kind of things, though I rarely go much further into research because they often scare me.

    I love Rat Kings though, I still can’t work out if the photos are hoaxes or actual ones they found. They’re gross either way :L

  • ravenflamingo March 29th, 2012 5:01 PM

    This is so creepy but awesome! The giant wolf thing freaked me out

  • zoey. March 29th, 2012 5:11 PM

    Wow! This definitely raised my interest. I didn’t even know this was a field of study.

  • violetfairydust March 29th, 2012 5:18 PM

    Very interesting post.

  • Naomi March 29th, 2012 5:35 PM

    more more more! this should be ten times longer!!!

  • aliceee March 29th, 2012 6:27 PM

    omg I’m totally asking my Thai friends about the Naree Pon.. I wonder how that conversation will go lol

    my friend & I had this inside joke where I called her a weredolphin, & then it turned out THAT’S A (“)REAL(“) THING (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Encantado), SO SHE PROBABLY IS ONE

  • lilghostie March 29th, 2012 6:27 PM

    OH MY GOD! I LOVE MOTHMAN! I was even able to score a moth man shirt years ago at goodwill and have had several people try to buy that thing right off my back, the things is priceless and even has “stats” on the back. too good to be true. mothman is so creepy but srsly so good.

  • MissKnowItAll March 29th, 2012 6:44 PM

    Oh Rookie, you never fail to impress me…

  • herdinthehalls March 29th, 2012 6:57 PM

    When I was in 6th grade, the school thought it was a good idea to bring in an author to tell us all of the Dogman http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michigan_Dogman . And showed pictures of giant wolf-like thingys and even included a song about it. Nonetheless nobody slept till 7th grade.

  • Pashupati March 29th, 2012 7:17 PM

    I’m lucky enough that there is a permanent presentation about rhinogrades in my city’s zoological museum!
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhinogradentia
    This.

  • Audrey March 29th, 2012 7:21 PM

    omgomgomg! so cool! ahhh.

  • Madness March 29th, 2012 8:12 PM

    SKUNK APE

  • Jamie March 29th, 2012 8:36 PM

    CANCEL ALL THE OTHER ARTICLES AND ONLY WRITE ABOUT THIS PLEASE.

  • Belinda March 29th, 2012 9:07 PM

    JERSEY DEVIL JERSEY DEVIL JERSEY DEVIL

    • Marie March 29th, 2012 10:01 PM

      I originally had a top ten and ran out of time but Jersey Devil was on it! Of course a Jersey Shore joke was with it too. I’ll do a follow up on my cryptoblog soon now that I know ROOKIEREADAZ are into it!

  • maddzwx March 29th, 2012 11:46 PM

    love it!

  • whodatgal March 30th, 2012 1:44 AM

    ahaa Love this!

    http://www.opheliahorton.wordpress.com

  • Cathleeng March 30th, 2012 8:41 AM

    If you like cryptozoology you need to check the mysterious universe podcast. It’s two Aussie guys who report on the weekly (yes weekly) news in cryptids and alien activity. So much fun to listen to! Mysteriousuniverse.org

  • starsinyourheart March 30th, 2012 9:28 AM

    i LOVE all this kinda stuff! The slightly creepy slightly totally could be real stuff. so fascinating!! jersey devil too, that is some scary shizzzzz

  • Krista March 30th, 2012 12:51 PM

    OMG MORE I NEED MORE

  • mayaautumn March 30th, 2012 5:11 PM

    omgeeeee! LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE (I could go on forever..) cryptozoology! eeeekXD

    http://cottonmixblog.blogspot.con

  • neon_rattail March 30th, 2012 5:16 PM

    This is amazing! I love stuff like this, but I didn’t realize there was a name for it! I’ve always had a soft spot for the Loch Ness Monster, and now I am more than intrigued by the Naree Pon. LUNGS?! ORGANS?! I need to do some research!
    http://neonrattail.blogspot.com

  • caitlinand March 30th, 2012 5:50 PM

    This is such an interesting article i will definitely be getting into cryptology! The Naree Pon interests me the most for sure, i laughed when you said booking the ticket to the monastery because i was thinking the same thing!
    xoxoox
    socksanddocs.blogspot.com

    • caitlinand March 30th, 2012 5:51 PM

      I MEAN CRYPTOZOOLOGY
      I READ THE ARTICLE I SWEAR

      • Pashupati March 31st, 2012 6:36 PM

        Cryptology is great too! :)

  • Hedwig April 1st, 2012 12:28 AM

    Naree Pon- I’ll meet you there

  • Cruicked April 1st, 2012 2:22 PM

    WRITE MORE. Also this is cool but also creepy.

  • Ben April 1st, 2012 2:57 PM

    OMG! I love this! If I was a mythical creature i would be a unipegatar(unicorn+pegasus+centar=Unipegatar!) I made it up two summers ago. Why dosen’t The Beast of Gévaudan in the picture have hooves? I was ar Riplees belive it or not and they had a thing that looked like the Naree Pon exept it had a tail and i think creepy sharp teath and it was supposedly a “mermaid.” I can imagine the luska sitting at the bottom of the ocean in a giant sink hole thing. It’s so weird! My brother had calamari for the first time yesterday and i tried some too. It was Ok.

    http://bensstylecorner.blogspot.com/

  • Impybat April 2nd, 2012 8:27 AM

    You gotta visit the International Cryptozoology Museum in Portland, Maine if you’re ever in the area. (http://cryptozoologymuseum.com/)

    If you’ve never read The Mothman Prophecies by the late, great John Keel, I highly recommend it. Very strange stuff. Aaaand get yourselves to the Fortean Times.com and register. Take a look at the message boards. You’ll be lost for hours.