Lana Del Rey
I knew I loved Lana Del Rey the moment I saw that other people hated her.
It’s not that I strive to be contrary—I just felt protective of her all of a sudden. I already admired her voice, lyrics, and aesthetic. Cat-eye makeup, flowers in her hair, a beehive—this ironic retro thing she is happy to acknowledge is simply cool-looking, instead of pretending there’s all this meaning behind it. I think of her as a cool scary friend’s cooler and scarier big sister, who gives you tips on hair and love and LIFE before sneaking out to go ride on the back of a boy’s motorcycle, but ’cause she’s so down to earth she always comes home around four to be like, “Hey, whatcha watchin’?” and you and your friend are like, “The Simpsons!” and because LDR is not above comedy that satirizes the lifestyle of a family living in Middle America, she’s like, “Sounds good, pass the Pepsi!” (The pizza place was out of Coke. Of course I don’t drink Pepsi by choice. What do you TAKE me for?)
And I don’t get why it’s so wrong for a pop star to use a stage name! Plus I feel like if LDR were really as MANUFACTURED as people say, she would’ve been better trained for SNL, wouldn’t have changed the spelling of her stage name so long after establishing it (Ray to Rey—bad for branding or whatever, I guess), and would have REALLY come out of nowhere, instead of spending years playing in clubs! For more reasons why I believe in her agency, I recommend this article by our own Jessica, which, disclaimer, I was interviewed for, but that is because I REALLY LOVE LANA DEL REY!
So basically, I defend Lana Del Rey in order to campaign against the stupidity of everyone else. Lana, you and I are LITERALLY the only people in the world who DON’T SUCK COMPLETELY. (Except for you, dear reader, and all of our fantastic advertisers!) Let us go discuss our hair some more, and when the world is ours, we will do so over not Pepsi, but Coke.