I can wear whatever I want! Freedom of expression! It’s in the Constitution!
Yeah, so lately I’ve been feeling angst, angst, angst, like “I hate authority! I AM THE HOLDEN CAULFIELD OF MY GENERATION!” Why, you ask? One reason is that I recently got this gorgeous black lipstick from Manic Panic. I had my mom order it for me online and she let me pay for it and receive it before she told me I’m not allowed to wear it. Because it’s “skanky.” It attracts the “wrong kind of people.” People “will judge” me.
She compared it to letting a little kid wear sexualized, revealing clothes. My view on this subject is complicated. I think everyone should be able to wear whatever makes them feel beautiful and comfortable, but to the rest of the world, you are what you wear. I believe it’s better not to wear certain clothing until you are comfortable, emotionally and physically, and usually people don’t reach this point in childhood.
After thinking on it, my response was that what I was wearing couldn’t possibly be dangerous or destructive, and I also mentioned slut-shaming somewhere in the conversation. I succeeded in convincing her to let me wear it at home, and then out, but not with Doc Martens. She said I’ll look like a ’90s mall goth. That’s what made me the most mad—she didn’t want me to wear something for the sole reason that she personally does not like it.
I took a different approach and accused her of selective discrimination. Nobody should tolerate the idea that being different is only OK sometimes, right? And so saying that black lipstick is OK under SOME circumstances doesn’t make a lot of sense.
By then, my mom was on the phone, so she wasn’t listening too well and said, “FINE, wear whatever you want.” I hope she knows I’m holding her to that forever.
I should be glad that I achieved my goal, but I’m disappointed that my mother gave me what I wanted only out of exasperation. Also, she thought the conversation was hilarious, but I was being totally serious.
I’ve worn the lipstick once so far—with my white Docs. I also wore a flowing skirt, a beige lace top, and a flower crown. I think the crown got some weird looks, but otherwise, nobody seemed to notice or care. ♦