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Editor’s Letter

December 2011: Home

I’m excited about this month because I love winter and the excuse to stay inside all day. I love snow while it’s still pretty. And holidays while they’re still pretty, before everyone just gets sick of one another. I love forts and sweaters and hot chocolate. Actually, I’m going to take this opportunity to offer up the very helpful tip of putting fun-size Crunch bars in your hot chocolate. Just slipping that in there because it’s not exactly original or clever enough to be its own DIY post.

But as much as I love my bed and family and hot chocolate, I don’t always feel at home, at home. I don’t always feel at home in my hometown. I was first made aware of the idea that home could be an identity you find or make yourself when I saw No Direction Home, the documentary about Bob Dylan’s life through 1965. He was born into a small town in Minnesota that was boring and simple, and went so far as to say he could’ve been born to the wrong parents. And he hoped to find home through his relationship with music.

His music came to mean a lot to me. After getting through the phase where you’re like, “I saw a documentary and now I’m an expert!” I actually did devour a couple more movies about him, read his book, read books about him, and of course listened to his albums until I couldn’t not mouth the words along subconsciously. I taught myself guitar so I could play his songs, and me and my best friend performed them at a record store together. I decided I would one day write a masterpiece called “Song to Bobby,” based on his own “Song to Woody.” I started carrying around a notebook every day in case inspiration were to strike. Whenever I could, I related a school project to him. I made a little book illustrating his songs for no one to see but myself. In a night’s angst, I painted the lyrics of “Like a Rolling Stone” on my wall. Oh, and I had a shrine at some point. A whole corner of my room: vinyl records, books, pictures from magazines, paper cutouts, candles. (The candles part was a little joking. I will give myself that.) The point is: I had found what made me feel like I was home, and I was serious about immersing myself in it.

Then I found out Cat Power already did the “Song to Bobby” thing. Then I remembered a former friend of mine who had Green Day lyrics painted on her own walls. And the one with Rent lyrics. Then I saw Dylan live at Summerfest and realized that as much as I believed my connection to his music was special, a bunch of college dudes in cowboy hats being way too loud and way too drunk did, too. Then my dad said casually and nostalgically one day while picking me up from a friend’s that he, too, once knew all the words to Dylan’s best albums, and wasn’t it crazy that his daughter would go on to do the same? I realized then that I would go through many phases in my Journey As An Adolescent, and that this was only the first. That in a matter of time, I would forget what it was about his music that I thought was so great. We have no shared experiences, and his lyrics don’t describe my feelings or whatever. It always just sounded right.

And in time, that would still be enough.

While this obsession had been pretty angst-ridden, it was also totally sincere. And, as the jadedness of growing to somehow understand the world has slowly made my enthusiasm for anything pretty rare, I do get a little homesick for that first phase of being a person who absorbs things and thinks about them. That first phase was a time when I was so much in my own world that I wasn’t aware of what a cliché that world made me, and so in awe of it that I wouldn’t have cared anyway. At the same time, it was the last time I would feel totally childlike in my outlook on something. And that’s, well, kind of a bummer.

On occasion when I do feel that weird, nebulous homesickness, I can take a step back and realize I’m feeling detached because I’ve probably done something I don’t believe in recently, but most of the time I’m not that thoughtful, and things just feel wrong.

The thing that had always fascinated me the most about Bob was that he was constantly changing—from a shy Woody Guthrie impersonator, to one of those musicians who somehow get away with being a total dick onstage and to their fans because they’re suddenly so badass and oh my god look at those SUNGLASSES and did you ever SEE such attitude, to a recluse, to a gospel singer, etc., until eventually presenting this world with this.

I take comfort in knowing that it’s OK, then, for me to change too, and that, when I need to, Bob Dylan will find his way back into my life as needed. As long as I can put on one of his records, I can always find home.

OK, now you know I have a soul or whatever. Welcome to December.

Love,
Tavi

63 Comments

  • Rhianna December 1st, 2011 3:09 PM

    Tavi, this at one point actually brought a tear to my eye as it’s so true and heartfelt, exactly how I feel about the music I love and used to love.
    If you don’t become the next U.S president or something then I may occupy the white house until you get elected, for real.

  • Izzy December 1st, 2011 3:12 PM

    I want to say something deep and agreeing and profound after reading this. I have the words in my head, but I can’t straighten them out enough to write. All I can say is this: hot chocolate with crunch bars souns very nice. I shall have to try it.

  • stephanie4786 December 1st, 2011 3:20 PM

    I always love reading your “letter from the editor” posts. they are some of my favorite to read out of the entire month.

  • Toilets December 1st, 2011 3:26 PM

    Seeing Bob Dylan is the best way I have ever spent eighty minutes, even if I could only see half of him and I was freezing and soaked with rain and other people’s beer, and had to queue for forty-five minutes afterwards to go for a pee.

    Hellooo, December :)

  • flowerpunk December 1st, 2011 3:26 PM

    I know that phase. I’ve been through it :)
    I even made this little comic thingy called “What can be found in Bob Dylan’s head”, it’s basically him and items from his songs drawn inside his head, kind of… They include a cup of coffee, a rolling stone, an 11 dollar bill, a coon skin cap and a tambourine…

  • maddy417 December 1st, 2011 3:28 PM

    i loved reading this so much because i get that same feeling of homesickness when i “move on” from phases. this week, i heard a maroon 5 song on the radio and it made me sort of sad because i was used to looove maroon 5 when i was a little kid. i got all nostalgic (and even felt a bit guilty!) for having moved on to more “highbrow” indie tastes since then. but at the same time, listening to them the other day was like opening a time capsule to my childhood; it made me feel at home in a way i had forgotten to feel in a long time.

    soooo yeah, long comment. but basically, this was perfect. thanks, tavi.

    also, the DIY crunch bar suggestion will definitely be used. :)

    • WitchesRave December 2nd, 2011 5:48 PM

      Gah!!
      I still remember unwrapping Songs About Jane on a christmas morning when i was like 9 years old an playing it over and over every night on my walkman and reading the lyrics in the CD leaflet, and then when i started using the internet, i searched every picture of Adam Levine, and every Maroon 5 interview on youtube everyday!! I felt the exact same as you when i heard Moves Like Jagger (I remember feeling hurt when as I got older i learnt that they werent exactly ”respected” musically) , so i put SAJ on my ipod and i couldnt stop myself from mouthing all the words!!

      ♥M5♥

  • lyndsey December 1st, 2011 3:31 PM

    hahaha bobby’s christmas album.. i almost died laughing watching that video.

  • moonchild December 1st, 2011 3:32 PM

    I love you Tavi. and I love winter. My home is the garment district :) I feel at home in fabric stores and millinery supply shops!

    http://under-a-bridge.blogspot.com/

  • Tavi December 1st, 2011 3:48 PM

    well SHUCKS guys, thanks! i was nervous about this one because it’s so much mushier than the other stuff i’ve written here. but i’m glad you like it. <3

  • Anna F. December 1st, 2011 3:54 PM

    You know what else is mushy?

    Crunch bars.

    In hot chocolate.

    • Anna F. December 1st, 2011 3:55 PM

      and yet they are delicious, which brings me to my point, mushy = excellent.

      • Toilets December 1st, 2011 5:25 PM

        I ordered a hot chocolate in Belgium and they brought me a chocolate bar in a cup of milk like it was the most normal thing ever, MAD.

  • Naomi December 1st, 2011 3:59 PM

    mushy but true! this captures part of my feelings for Brucie baby. i have a mini tiny little shrine for him and his picture holds the prime position above my bed.

  • FashionHauties December 1st, 2011 4:05 PM

    This is SO true. I love this post so much- and great tip for the Hot Chocolate- I’m gonna try that now! :)
    http://fashionhauties.blogspot.com/2011/11/vintage-on-way.html

  • Dee December 1st, 2011 4:11 PM

    I love this piece. I really wish this magazine existed when I was in high school; I would have felt a lot less alone.
    I love this idea of being connected to a former self, a kind of self that is romanticized in your head, and then executed. That’s kind of what adolescence is all about.
    I always had/have a similar fear of being a cliche, because I like to think I’m so clever and unique and gem in the world, but the world is HUGE. And as depressing as that idea may seem, it shouldn’t serve to invalidate the sincerity of feelings and thoughts. Those are still real. I think the fear of being unoriginal can really inhibit a person from being creative and thoughtful.

  • Lylou December 1st, 2011 4:44 PM

    There was some very familiar about that post, it was like you read my mind or something! Looking forward to December Rookie XXX

  • Beatrix December 1st, 2011 4:46 PM

    Is it too late to submit anything for this month?

  • MADZ. December 1st, 2011 4:50 PM

    I totally had an obsession with Bob Dylan in 5th grade… I’ve heard everyone goes through their “Dylan” phase, but yeah that whole year I had a “shrine” dedicated to him, it was actually pretty intense.

    This whole home theme is giving me an Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros vibe.
    (so supreme)

  • Bardot December 1st, 2011 5:08 PM

    TAVI! Rookie just keeps on getting better and better, thank you for being so fantastic! xxxxxxxxx

  • Bardot December 1st, 2011 5:08 PM

    LOVE YOU BOBBY D

  • GagaMcQueen December 1st, 2011 5:16 PM

    I think music crushes/obsessions are one of the most amazing experiences, but I still haven’t reached the point where looking back on things I used to feel such a conection to doesn’t make me deeply sad. Right now I have Gaga to sing me through life, just like you had Bob. I hope it never gets any less new-feeling… This is a GREAT article, and it is easy to relate to. Thanks!

  • ness December 1st, 2011 5:19 PM

    Any chocolate bar in hot chocolate (or coffee) is the most awsomest thing ever! Have you tried it with KitKat?

    Also I can’t express how much I relate to this post. A few days ago I came across a playlist I had made back in middle school and it feels so comforting listening to it!

  • C.M. December 1st, 2011 5:24 PM

    SO PSYCHED

  • moonchild December 1st, 2011 5:43 PM

    I wish I had something like this… but I feel like it wouldn’t be real enough if I try to find it consciously. Like, I haven’t really found music that takes my breath away.

    It kind of makes me sad.

    I want something to be obsessed about and make shrines for. But I also want it to be authentic.

    *sigh…

    http://under-a-bridge.blogspot.com/

  • unicorn December 1st, 2011 6:00 PM

    since you don’t want to do an entire article on just putting crunch bars in hot chocolate, do an entire thing on what you can put into hot chocolate.

  • Catelyn December 1st, 2011 6:10 PM

    Tavi, I love this so much! I wrote the lyrics to Blowin in the Wind on purple construction paper and tapped it on a wall in my room. I have Free Wheelin’ on vinyl. I have Like A Rolling Stone on my ipod and every time I listen to it I think, “God, I love Bob Dylan.” His imagery is so freaking amazing. :)

  • Kathryn December 1st, 2011 6:26 PM

    I’m so excited for this month! November went by madly fast.
    great post, tavi! I can totally relate to it, too.

  • Bren December 1st, 2011 6:49 PM

    I’m so looking forward to this month.
    I’m kicking myself so hard for not sending something in, because I haven’t been home in a year and I though hey, December Rookie will be perfect to send something though, and I totally chickened out. I’m so excited to see what you guys have in store.

  • Catelyn December 1st, 2011 6:58 PM

    Wow, you got me on a little Bob Dylan episode after reading this. Maybe I’ll listen to my album tonite and I want to watch his documentary again. I had the same sort of thing that you had with him only for me it was the Beatles. I still have the pictures I put up of them in my room. :)

  • Bean December 1st, 2011 7:08 PM

    “I always tell the girls, never take it seriously, if ya never take it seriosuly, ya never get hurt, ya never get hurt, ya always have fun, and if you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends.”
    -Penny Lane, Almost Famous.
    It seemed fitting based on that last little bit and I reference this movie a rediculous amount anyways so this is just normal for me.

    • CariStereo December 1st, 2011 11:25 PM

      This movie is _everything_ if you’re a person obsessed with music. <3

  • Paloma December 1st, 2011 7:18 PM

    DEAR LORD I did not know that Bob Dylan Christmas song/music video existed…so thank you… Apparently Bill Nighy is a real devoted fan of Bob Dylan and listens to his music every single day~fun fact~ My personal comfort obsession is Tim Burton. I read all the random biographies, watched every single youtube interview, tracked down a copy of The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy (which everyone should read), etc. I even went into a Hot Topic for the first time in my life just to buy black and white striped socks. I remember there being more black paint and screaming music than there is now and I was terrified. I’m remembering a part of a biography where Tim Burton talks about his early years at the Disney animation studios and he would just walk around with bloody gums from having his wisdom teeth removed. I decided then that if he could make it in the world, I could. It really helped me grow as an individual, as corny as it sounds. Obsessions are so unique to “the developing years of teenagerhood,” but the world has plenty of obsessions to offer and I vow to stay open minded!!

  • December 1st, 2011 7:22 PM

    I basically have the same story as yours, but with The Beatles. To keep the magic alive (for want of a better phrase), Tavi, maybe try to always read about him and look at stuff about him with fresh eyes, and listen to his music with fresh ears (fresh eyes? fresh ears?).

    When I do this with The Beatles, I always manage to discover something and sometimes many things that I hadn’t noticed before – and that makes me happy and excited again. I think you’ll still get some nice feelings of nostalgia, but then with your newly harvested (?) eyes and ears, you’ll always be able to make Bob an important, special, and current part of your life :-)

  • QueenSheba December 1st, 2011 8:25 PM

    I always feel like a massive creep when I comment on things on the interweb so I try to avoid doing so BUT I just HAD to when I saw that this was about Bob Dylan. I started listening to him in 2009 and told every single person I came across to listen to him, too. It was weird how his words really seemed to ring true, even if I wasn’t quite sure of thier meaning. I seem to go through periods of listening to him and nothing else and then not listening to him at all. And I’m always scared that one day I’ll GROW UP and forget what it was that made his songs important to me. I don’t know how you guys do it, but your monthly themes always seem to coincide with my thoughts at the time, and this months theme has really come at the ‘right’ time. Wish there was waaaaay more stuff out there like this.

  • doloreshaze December 1st, 2011 8:39 PM

    Love this piece! I too was obssessed with Bob starting when I was 16 or 17 (and I sold my guitar to get enough money to go see him live)….I’m 23 now and my love for his music and his persona hasn’t subsided. Nowadays I hear a lot of different music but Bob will always have a special place in my heart. His lyrics are more meaningful to me than any other artist.. I still keep lyrics from one of his songs in my wallet: God knows there’s a purpouse / God knows there’s a chance / God knows you can rise above the darkest hour / of any circumstance. <3

  • Freja December 1st, 2011 8:44 PM

    This month at Rookie is doubly relevant to me at the moment! I’m about to head off to Denmark for Christmas with family. Even though I’m Australian, I’ve spent so many ‘summer’ holidays in Denmark that winter there feels more like home than any other season here. It’s begun to creep into blisteringly hot days and this post has fueled my longing for cable-knit sweaters and blue-lit, snowy days.

    I hope there’s a reference to Hygge this month! It’s the very essence of home and there’s nothing more important than it in wintertime. I think I’m right in saying you speak Norwegian or have a Norwegian family, Tavi? If so, then you probably know what I mean!

  • NMHfan December 1st, 2011 9:29 PM

    I’m 24 and only a quarter as amazing as Tavi.

  • annagracie December 1st, 2011 10:18 PM

    This is so great. Tavi, you’re so great!

  • danielasound December 1st, 2011 10:38 PM

    I looove Bob Dylan! Blonde on blonde along with Bringing it all back home and blood on the tracks it provides such a rich soundtrack to my life. Sometimes I’m feeling down or happy or disappointed and dylan’s lyrics pop in my head.
    I remember feeling very disappointed with my friends at some point and thinking about “Positively 4th Street”‘s lyrics.
    Even though he changed a lot through the years I value his music deeply and this just brought back lots of memories.

  • CariStereo December 1st, 2011 11:17 PM

    Tavi girl, I HEAR YOU.

    The Beatles were my home; they became so after the death of John Lennon. I remember watching the news about his shooting and asked my mom who The Beatles were, and she got mad at me for not knowing something so obvious. I became an obsessed little kid; I memorized lyrics, trivia, photographs, movies (I’d fail a quiz now, though). So what if that made me a slightly odd bird among the kids at school. Something about them informed all of my musical tastes, my comedic tastes, and my sartorial tastes forever after.

    Now when I see one of their photos or hear their songs, it’s like a welcome home hug from mom.

    You’re so amazing, Tavi. Keep being who you are.

  • Spence December 2nd, 2011 12:14 AM

    OH MY GOSH! Okay I have LOVED Rookie since I got here way back in September after following a link out of a yahoo page about Miss Wonderful Tavi! WHAT TOOK ME SO LONG TO COMMENT!? AM I CRAZY?

    Anyhoo, I love this site, and i’m a 21 yr old guy who should have commented on the perfect Rocky Horror article back in october, or half the d.i.y vids, and may I now confess my LOVE 4 Petra , her pictures, and her PANTS!

    Still, it took this article and this subject matter 4 me to start my frist comment of many to come!

    I CAN’T STAND BOB DYLAN! :) But I have great respect 4 him and his fans, just not my cup of tea. BUT DAVID BOWIE, thats different!

    I feel like i’m at home with David Bowie. I’m as hardcore about him, (and my newfound home…Lady Gaga…no eyerolling hipsters! I SEE Y’ALL!), as Tavi is about Bob. When that speical something or someone means the world to you, that becomes your world. And try as the powers that be might they can never take that world away, beacause you created it.

    So i’m looking super forward to this month and this subject, and there better be some Wizard Of Oz inspired something or other stuff, because thats also a “Home” to me! Y’all dig yo!? ;)

    God Bless y’all Rookie people, HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS! *Warm Fuzzy Feelins* :)

  • sarahbear December 2nd, 2011 1:23 AM

    This is lovely, Tavi. It’s really beautiful. You have always surprised me with your uncannily sharp insights, especially into some ideas and issues unusual for your age at the time. I really like seeing you bring the same attention and level of insight to how it is to actually be the age you are right now.

    For a little context, I’m twenty and a college sophomore. I had the same childhood naivete followed by the same adolescent skepticism, and I also started to feel like fewer and fewer things had the potential to make me happy–my skepticism supergun shot most ideas down.

    Now I’m realizing that there’s so much more beautiful complexity out there in the world than we think when we’re in our “everything has irredeemable flaws” phase. Things you’ve been completely skeptical of seem like they might make sense There will be a new phase in which, as you repeat the same skeptical argument, you suddenly realize that just like whatever you’re arguing against is not perfect, neither is it irredeemable.

    I’ve found this phase both frustrating and really really exciting. Once you really understand how much trouble humanity is in, it’s pretty great to think that maybe that trouble is fixable. A whole lot of ideas you will give more and more credence to will help save the world.

    Basically, this phase will come, and you’ll re-find a matured version of your childhood joy. Skepticism is the cocoon in which the silkworm of your childhood enthusiasm morphs into a moth. I can’t wait for this to happen to you. I hope I get the chance to read your thoughts on this next phase and many more.

  • LittleRed December 2nd, 2011 2:59 AM

    I too have had a long love affair with Bob Dylan. He has such a passionate, unique and creative spirit. I feel that in a previous life I was a Dylan groupie.

    It’s summer here and boiling hot everyday. I’ve never even seen the snow!

    X

  • Leilani December 2nd, 2011 3:00 AM

    I’m so excited for this month because I spy on the moodboard the album cover for The Freewheelin’ and Bob and Suze are on the background today and because…well, this post almost made me cry! (tears of joy, of course)

    It’s just…gosh I am so excited.

    Bob Dylan ftw! (or whatever)

  • shell December 2nd, 2011 5:02 AM

    I too developed an obsession with Bob Dylan’s music and mythology at a young age (10), but I haven’t really heard anyone talk about having a similar experience. I find as I get older, I can keep returning to his music with a different perspective. I recently read “Positively Fourth Street” (which is a book about Joan Baez, Bob Dylan, Mimi Baez Farina and Dick Farina) and that brought another new perspective. I recommend reading that if you haven’t checked it out. I also recommend the film “I’m Not There” that came out a few years back. If you’ve seen it, I wonder what your take on it is. I loved it personally. I definitely thought some parts were pretty bad, but to me that only seemed fitting for a film about him.

  • Raindrops December 2nd, 2011 9:23 AM

    Tavi, this editor’s letter is my favourite so far! I can so much relate to that feeling you describe. It’s been a long time since I felt completely AT HOME in my hometown, my house, my school etc. I think it’s natural because you just were born somewhere and maybe that place doesn’t really fit into what person you have become. But on the other hand, there are some places, songs and movies where I will always feel completely at home. And maybe a bit sad because as you’re a teenager, you go through several phases and when you have “grown out of them” (I don’t know if one can say this in english,sorry) you just move on, maybe to completely other places and songs and movies,
    and then you feel at home there.
    That is life…

  • Mustachefan December 2nd, 2011 12:24 PM

    Tavi, it’s really unfair how cool you are. This is beautiful.

  • supdudebro December 2nd, 2011 1:33 PM

    I wither a little every time I hear someone refer to their “Bob Dylan phase”. Yeah, I’m sure it’s common to become progressively indifferent to music that you previously loved (Oh hi there Muse, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Wiggles, childhood!), but DYLAN? I think there is definitely a cliché of the obsessive Dylan fan, and when people become conscious of this they feel the need to distance themselves. I’m 18, and have loved his music since I was about 13. I have listened to all of his albums (except Self Portrait and the Bootlegs 1-3, I’m saving those), I’ve read his book. Admittedly, no murals or reliquaries. But I continue to appreciate his music, and I don’t see myself getting tired of it any time soon.

    So what if he has a legion of garbage-searching, cowboy-hat-wearing, wall-painting douchebags as fans? Can’t we still appreciate the artistry of “Chimes of Freedom” or “When the Deal Goes Down”? I think it’s interesting you raised “childlike outlook” because in a way that’s what his lyrics do – they present us with the unfamiliar in the form of a dazzling string of images, they confuse us and let us delight in the pure sound of the words… and somehow from this we form an understanding of the world. Something like “Gates of Eden” which used to annoy me because the lyrics are meaningless, today is so interesting to me because it seems to grasp at something beyond the limits of understanding – something too hot to touch. And I don’t give a shit if Bob never intended it that way! Maybe he sat down in the studio and said “let’s confuse the bastards so they keep buying records”. Maybe Shakespeare said “lets write about cross-dressers because they’re gross LOL” (ok maybe not but you get the idea).

    And I disagree than you and bob “have no shared experiences” and that his lyrics don’t describe your feelings. Of course they do. Maybe he didn’t have Tavi in mind, but he was still scraping from that same barrel – laced with honey and vitriol – that we call life. (apologies for terrible metaphor. on a side note, it’s the same reason I love Joni Mitchell’s Blue: people call that album “confessional” but I think that’s totally crap, it’s just an album that speaks honestly about life). The reason he always evaded questions about his intentions with jokes or insults is because bob knew people take out of things whatever they want, and there’s no point limiting that with discussions of “what were you trying to say here?” And I’m not saying that everything Bob did is amazing (though his recent albums are amazing, Empire Burlesque is amazing, his voice is not shit, he is still good live). I find a lot of those protest songs boring, and “Joey” is the most laughably awful thing I have ever heard.

    What I’m tying to say is – your connection to his music IS special, as is your connection to any great art. I probably come off as a rabid Dylan fan in this comment but I’m just trying to defend things that become unhip because they’re popular, or because of a cliché. If it’s just that bob doesn’t do it for you any more, that’s fine (but you’re insane), if it’s that you feel like you can’t appreciate something because so many people feel the same way, to a ridiculous extent (shrines? really?), then you’re probably depriving yourself of something really great.

    P.S. Bowie did “Song for Bob Dylan” before Cat Power!

  • pangirl December 2nd, 2011 1:34 PM

    Tavi,
    You just wrote my adolescent life story. I am amazed at how Bob Dylan has the same effect on so many people and how they are able to retain that unique feeling of connection that they had. I still believe in the me I was during that time and the beauty of discovering something that I felt so in tuned with and then changing and looking back after that and recalling the magic. THAT is home to me. Beautiful letter, Tavi-thanks!

  • Renatotherescue December 2nd, 2011 5:20 PM

    woow tavi,
    you and my dylan-relationship is so much alike!
    i watched the no direction home DVDs with my dylan-loving mom, and a couple of other dylan-DVDs (he was so cute at newport folk fest!)
    and me and my mom also went to a dylan concert a few months ago, and i was kinda ‘supriced’ by drunken dylanfans too
    and it was nly yesterday that we were talking about if there would be someone who would visit dylan at his old days and play a self-written song for him,

    well tavi, i cant wait to hear your hey hey bobby dylan, i wrote you a song-song :3
    XXXX urbiggestfan (even bigger after reading this!)

  • RiRi December 3rd, 2011 4:56 AM

    Yeah i have this same “Connection” with She&Him. Its strange how you feel so attached to them even though they are miles apart. Also i have a confession. I have never listened to Bob Dylan. I know i really should, but the time hasn’t not come yet ( well after this wonderful post, I think I may.)

  • kelsey December 4th, 2011 1:07 AM

    I miss the me that could become unabashedly obsessive over things too. I don’t even remember what my last obsession was.

    I tell myself that when (not if, I am preserving some hope) I get that feeling again it might be even better than my freshman-year manias, simply because it hasn’t happened in a while.

    I’m also interested to see what the next obsession, when it rolls around, will be. Who knows – something marvelous might saunter through my door tomorrow.

  • bemboozled December 4th, 2011 5:41 PM

    loving the newest issue/theme thus far!

    I totally relate to the issue of feeling a sense of detachment to your former self/phase of your life.

    I used to be really passionate about activism/protesting, and I got somewhat jaded about it in the past year or two, and visiting occupy LA left me with a sense of longing, but also a painful reminder of the disillusionment I had gone through.

    feel free to check out this photo tumblr I made of my visit there. It was a weird transition for me to be a silent observer, behind a lens, rather than one of the people with the signs.

    http://femspace.tumblr.com/

    and here’s a post about how I felt: http://femspace.tumblr.com/post/13746486213/occupy-la

  • saranev December 4th, 2011 11:09 PM

    I was so obsessed with Something Corporate during my freshman & sophomore years of high school. The Wicked soundtrack was my obsession junior & senior years. The lyrics and deeper meaning conveyed by these artists/albums/songs meant so much to me and it’s funny to think back now at how unaware I was that I had created these obsessions… that it would be something that repeats itself throughout my life. I mean, it’s profound to think of how introspective you are as a 15 year-old, Tavi, and how unaware I was of what I was going through when I was 15.

    Right now, my SOUL sister is Sara Bareilles, and I’m sure that will someday fade, too. I’ll always have the connection to her music because it helped me through an era of my life, but it’s funny how quickly things change (in the grand scheme of things)… how at home we can feel within another person’s words, and how quickly that “home” can fade, too. Hmm..!

  • warreno December 7th, 2011 5:17 PM

    ‘I realized then that I would go through many phases in my Journey As An Adolescent, and that this was only the first. That in a matter of time, I would forget what it was about his music that I thought was so great.’

    That hasn’t been true, in my experience with Thomas Dolby, who hit me like a sack of synth-new wave sledgehammers in 1981. Sure, his music is ‘owned’ by other people who like it, were moved by it, and so on – and he’s definitely got much bigger fans than I ever will be – but it was something that spoke to me in a meaningful way at the time, and continues to do so.

    That doesn’t mean I endlessly play his tracks over and over and over again. What it means is that the connection, once made, never gets unmade. At least that’s the way it’s been for me.

  • Marie December 7th, 2011 7:10 PM

    One time a boy serenaded “Absolutely Sweet Marie” on my voice mail. VERY NICE

  • Marie December 7th, 2011 7:11 PM

    Actually it was also sad because I was ignoring him so he was like WHERE ARE YOU TONIGHT SWEET MARIE

    STILL NICE THO

  • Hayley December 30th, 2011 11:04 PM

    I always feel so sad when I realize that I’m not a kid anymore, and I’ll never love things like little kids do. Like I’ll never love books as unequivocally as I loved Harry Potter when I was ten. And I’ll never be able to just ‘absorb’ something without doubting it.

    Anyway. I know the feeling, Tavi. Glad you wrote about it.